A while back, I wrote a post called When We’re Gone: On Death and Blogging, which discussed what happens to our blogs and online identities after we die. It’s a topic that I’ve struggled with, knowing my wife is not aware of what I do to keep my blog online and outside of pre-paying for my domain/hosting, there really isn’t anything I can do after I die.
This post led to a great conversation with Parker via email regarding death and our digital life. Parker encouraged me to go with my thoughts of leaving some specific instructions for my wife to help convey the message should I pass away, so I wouldn’t leave people wondering. Parker was speaking from a personal experience, which I will point you toward his page for proper explanation further down.
As Parker and I chatted, we discussed Facebook’s legacy contact, hard copies, and keeping email lists, and Parker mentioned creating an If You Think I Am Dead page. The idea is to leave a public set of instructions online, in the event that let’s say, both my wife and I pass away together in an accident.
I created a bit of an outline, but it’s a difficult thing to put into practice. Before I managed to get mine up and running, Parker created one of his own titled, What to Do If You Think I Might Be Dead.
On this page, Parker leaves a short set of instructions, a list of organizations to reach out to, and a personal list of things he needs to put together in preparation for his own death. It’s a simple page, but an extremely effective page. Everything is in one place and while I’m sure his page is going to evolve; I really love the concept. I think it’s something all of us bloggers need to look into creating. Maybe we do not have to list it on our main headers, but maybe we can stick it someplace in our About pages or in the footer of our pages.
If you’ve been online for a while, it is more than likely you’ve encountered a situation where a blogger just went quiet, or a social media account stopped updating. You assume the worst, after a while, but there is always that lingering thought of, “What if they are just taking a break?” I think these sorts of pages could really help in cutting down that sort of confusion and while it’s not a perfect solution, I honestly cannot think of anything else that is nearly as effective.
Anyway, be sure to check out Parker’s What to Do If You Think I Might Be Dead and read up on what inspired him to put it online. I’ll be working on getting mine together in the near future.
I had been disconnected from the happenings of personal blogging for quite some time, so it a shock to the system when I first read that dooce (Heather Armstrong) had died last year. I wasn’t an avid reader, but she was one of the first people I knew of in the blogging space who felt “famous” and I had always appreciated her writing style.
Your post similarly made me think back to Derek (https://www.penmachine.com/).
It’s an interesting thought experiment and an actionable one at that. One thought that sticks with me is that I virtually disappeared around 2004 and only just recently re-emerged; I wonder if anyone noticed that I was gone?
Wow, yea Derek’s post is spot on.
I’ve also disappeared from communities at random over the years. I honestly didn’t think much of it at the time but it seems that sort of behavior just doesn’t provide any sort of closure which I guess we need. I think I personally undervalue some of the online work and what it can mean for some folks.