Summer Seasonal Affective Disorder

Folks associate SADS or seasonal affective disorder with the cold and dreary winter, but I’m convinced I struggle the most from this during the summer. As the heat increases, my desire to leave the house decreases and I begin to feel miserable. I hate being hot and that makes me want to move less. As today marks the fourth or fifth day of triple digit temperatures, I realized that this has corresponded with me disengaging from my usual activities.

For the first time since December, I haven’t tracked my calories daily. I stopped over the weekend, and while I’m still eating relatively healthy, I’m not tracking them like I should which will only result in me gaining weight. I also haven’t worked out for the first time in over a week. The toasty humid garage is not inviting, and I’m still dealing with foot problems following my one and only kung fu class. 

Of course, not working out and not going to kung fu, has only led to some negative messaging in my head, which in return makes me feel even worse. I’ve struggled big-time with my mental health this week, but thankfully, I realized it enough to just stop and let myself off the hook a bit. So, what if I don’t go to kung fu? Missing a week of workouts isn’t going to hurt anything, in fact, it might help this stupid foot heal up a bit more. Maybe I just need a break to reset, and maybe its best I take it when its absolutely miserable outside.

So, what have I done? Well, I started watching The Stand, the 1994 mini-series for the first time in a couple of decades. I started it on a whim after an urge to watch something 90s Stephen King, and I found myself really enjoying it. I watched it several times as a kid, and I really didn’t think I’d ever watch it again, but it’s been exactly what I’ve needed. Something familiar, and entertaining.

When I started The Stand, I realized that my search for a new fiction book had come to an end. I’ve been wanting to dip my toe into more fantasy, but I just haven’t found the right book or series, when I remembered The Dark Tower. I’m a huge fan of King and Westerns, but my dislike of fantasy always turned me off from the series. Now, it’s time to see if The Dark Tower is something I want to explore, so I started reading The Gunslinger and I’m enjoying it.

I’m not going to rush myself to get back on track. I think I need a few more days to just exist without the pressures of cutting calories, working out, meeting people for dinner, reducing my soda intake, job hunting, and what not. I just need a little break to deal with all the regular crap life throws at me.